a fellow goes in a bar and orders a pint and a thimble-full of beer.When served, he reaches in his pocket and pulls out this beautiful miniature grand piano. A real baby grand.
From the other pocket he pulls out this tiny little man dressed in top hat and tails. Who starts drinking from the timble.
Barman says "wow! Where did you get him?"
The little fellow starts playing Chopin. Tis really nice.
Customer says: "well, I met these Irish faeries and they must have misheard my wish. I did *not* ask for a nine-incjh pianist..
A termite walks into a bar and says: "Is the bartender here?"
Two Germans go into a bar in France, just wanting a drink.Knowing that the French don't really like Germans, they decided to pretend to be American. The one who spoke better English ordered, "Two martinis, please."
The bartender asked, "Martinis dry?"
The startled German responded, "Nein! Zwei!"