dirty little poems

There once was a man named Merkin.

He was always jerkin' his gherkin.

Said his wife to Merkin,

"Your duty, you're shirkin':

Your gherkin's for firkin' not jerkin'!"

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There once was plumber from Bree

Who was plumbing a girl by the sea

When she said "someone's coming!"

Said the plumber, still plumbing,

"If anyone's coming, it's me!"

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Mary had a little skirt

Split right up the sides,

And every time she wore that skirt

The boys could see her thighs.

She also had another skirt

Split right up the front

But she never wore that one.