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Crow Mystery Solved

Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near Boston, MA recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu.  A Bird Pathologist examined the

remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu.  The cause of death appeared to be vehicular

impacts.

However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws.  By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car. 

MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow nearby tree to warn of impending danger.

The conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say ""Cah"", none could say ""Truck.""

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Teacher: Denis,what is the chemical formula for water?

Denis: HIJKLMNO

Teacher: what are you talking about?

Denis: yesterday you said it`s H to O

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The  most effective way to catch an elephant: 

 Dig a huge pit and fill it with ashes.  Place a row of baby peas around the pit.  When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick him in the ash-hole.