μεταφραζονται;;;

A lady awoke one morning and discovered her dog was not moving.She called her vet who asked her to bring the dog in.After a brief examination, the vet pronounced the dog dead. 

"Are you sure?", the distraught woman asked.  "He was a great family pet.Isn't there anything else you can do?"

The vet paused for a moment and said, "There is one more thing we can do."

He left the room for a moment and came back carrying a large cage with a cat in it.  The vet opened the cage door and the cat walked over to the dog.The cat sniffed the dog from head to toe and walked back to the cage.

"Well, that confirms it." the vet announced.  "Your dog is dead."

Satisfied that the vet had done everything he possibly could, the woman sighed,  "How much do I owe you?"

"That will be $330." the vet replied."I don't believe it!!!", screamed the woman.  "What did you do that cost $330???"

"Well", the vet replied, "it's $30 for the office visit and

$300 for the cat scan."

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A man was afflicted with a most persistent and uncontrollable flatulence of a most foul and offensive odor.  Furthermore, it had a sound, consisting of a heavy percussive "THWUUP, mingled with the unusual but unmistakable sound of  "HONDA!!”.

The man had done everything possible in an effort to cure his condition.   He tried all the usual remedies, including doctors and specialists, and these offering no relief.  He sought out the unusual ones as well.   The only thing both approaches relieved him of was his

money..  The problem persisted.  Friends, relatives, acquaintances shunned him and his resounding, odoriferous THWUUP/HONDA!!!

Then he heard about a Japanese dentist who had had some success with these problems.  Desperate, he made an appointment.  The next day found him in a dentist’s chair with the Japanese practitioner gently prying

and prodding about in his mouth.  After a few shots of Novocain, the dentist deftly slashed away with a scalpel at the man’s jaw and squeezed out a quantity of foul pus.  After applying some gauze, the dentist indicated that all was finished and the man was free to leave.

Incredulously, the man inquired, "And all the time, THIS has been the source of my problem?"

In a very heavy thick oriental accent the dentist patiently explained:

  "ahhhh soooo, abscess make the fart go honda"